Friend or foe?

Phrases like "best friends forever" and "i'll always be there for you" become empty words. Like any relationship, a friendship must be nurtured. But what happens when there's nothing to salvage? As he or she is just not that into you, a friend may not be into you, anymore. It's sad to realize that some friendships don't last, but it's important to cherish those who remain.

Asians in the Media Controversy: "Last Airbender" flick

In light of the film debut for M. Night Shyamalan's "Last Airbender," here's something to think about before watching this new summer flick. A protest will be held at the Hollywood Arclight today. For more info: http://blog.angryasianman.com/2010/06/protest-last-airbender-this-thursday-in.html

APA Groups: Casting in 'The Last Airbender' is 'Whitewashing'

The film's one main Asian actor, Dev Patel of 'Slumdog Millionaire,' will play a villain. By Melissa Chua, P.C. Web Reporter Published May 15, 2009 Hollywood is doing it again. In the wake of "Dragonball: Evolution" and "21" - films that ignited controversy over their casting of mostly Caucasian actors in roles originally written for Asian Pacific Americans - another Hollywood movie studio is drawing similar criticism. M. Night Shyamalan's upcoming movie "The Last Airbender," based on the Nickelodeon television series "Avatar: The Last Airbender," isn't set for release until 2010, but fans and APA advocacy groups are already accusing the production of racial bias in its selection of white actors to portray Asian characters. The popular animated series takes place in an Asian fantasy world inspired by Asian cultures and themes. The characters practice East Asian martial arts and dress in traditional Asian attire. They even write with Chinese characters. Yet in the film adaptation of the series, white actors play three out of four of the main characters. Dev Patel, of "Slumdog Millionaire" fame, will be the sole Asian face in the upcoming film version of "Airbender." Among the critics are members of the Media Action Network for Asian Americans (MANAA), the Los Angeles-based theater East West Players, and Racebending.com - a Web site launched in response to the film's casting. "People need to realize that recasting Asian actors as white actors is institutionalized discrimination that affect children who perceive white as the norm, even in a world that is Asian-based," said Loraine Sammy, public relations coordinator for Racebending.com. "This was a chance for actors from our community to be represented, but that chance was taken away," said Marissa Lee, also of Racebending.com. The "Airbender" casting sends a message to the public that white actors are more qualified and entitled than APA actors to play Asian characters, added Lee. So far Paramount Pictures, the studio backing the film, has remained tight-lipped about the casting process. "At this time, Paramount does not have a comment to share," said Michael Agulnek, vice president of national publicity and the film's lead publicist. But in a statement, "Airbender" producers said they "envisioned embodying the 'Airbender' universe with a large and ethnically diverse cast that represents many different heritages and cultures from all corners of the globe." "Diversity is good, but not when you're making the background more diverse and the foreground less diverse," said Lee. "The more this happens, the easier it gets for Hollywood to get away with it." In December when news of the casting broke, outraged fans began protesting with a letter-writing campaign, a petition and a direct response Web site. "Fans, most of which identify themselves as white, Latino and black, are really concerned that this racial discrimination sends a terrible message to children especially Asian children because they can't see themselves on screen," said Guy Aoki, co-founder of MANAA. Community leaders also expressed outrage when the film's casting director Deedra Ricketts told the Daily Pennsylvanian that she had asked extras auditioning for roles "to dress in traditional cultural ethnic attire ... if you're Korean, wear a kimono. If you're from Belgium, wear lederhosen." In response to Rickett's comments, East West Players' Tim Dang wrote a letter to Paramount blasting the studio. "Besides the ignorance of confusing Korean hanboks with Japanese kimonos, Ms. Ricketts' call for extras to come looking ethnic and foreign could not contrast more sharply with the casting of whites for most of the leading roles." Also at contention is Patel's character, Zuko - a villain. APA activists say movies like "Fu Manchu", "Breakfast at Tiffany's" and "Sixteen Candles", show that Hollywood has a long record of casting actors of color as villains or stereotypical characters. "Very rarely are Asian people allowed to be cast heroes in the story," said Aoki. MANAA and Racebending.com are calling for a boycott of the film when it is released next summer. "We can refuse to support movies like these that are willing to sell actors of color short for whatever reason and to deny what they've done by casting people of color as extras," said Lee. For more information: www.manaa.org, www.racebending.com

Keeping it real

Some people fake their ages. Some people fake relationships. Some even fake their entire lives. One little white lie turns into a million white lies, and eventually it's an unending blur of fabrication.

We all lie. We're only human. But some lies are intended to hurt and offend. I don't like liars and especially cannot stand BSers.

People should say what they mean and nothing more. If you're going to say something, mean it. Words are just words until you give them meaning with action.

Lately, I've encountered many versions of BSers. They all have one thing in common--talking just to please and impress me without any follow through. It's so silly. Can't we just be real? BSing is essentially lying often with a selfish intent. Whoever thought compulsive liars and nonstop BSers were attractive was seriously mistaken. I want to meet authentic people who want genuine relationships. No games, just life.

Downward Dog is a Yogi's best friend

For an hour and a half, I can escape and completely focus on letting go. I've been to Rising Lotus Yoga in Sherman Oaks many times before, but I finally got my butt into one of Daniel Stewart's (studio owner) classes. He started off with some kirtan (yogic chanting), and slowly we started flowing. From the varying repetition of warrior poses and crescent pose to utkatasana (chair pose), downward-facing dog always feels good after a vinyasa (flow) and those chaturangas.

Chaturanga is a transitional sequence where you lower down slowly breathing out from a plank (push-up) position and roll up breathing in to cobra or up-dog peeling your shoulders back and opening your heart forward. Breathing out again, you release your core and pelvis upward into downward-facing dog for a few breaths. It's one of the best feelings.

My favorite part of class was when we went over to the wall and worked on inversions, which is really just a fancy term for handstands and headstands--poses where your feet are raised above your head. The headstand is supposed to be a very stress relieving asana (pose). We worked on the forearm stand and headstand, and like most yoga classes, we topped that section off with plow pose and shoulderstand.

Rising Lotus is a welcoming place to practice for new and experienced yogis and yoginis. I appreciate when teachers make an effort to assist and support my personal practice. Daniel was a friendly teacher who I'd definitely take again. I also recommend Claire Hartley, the co-owner.
"Let joy rise."

Rising Lotus Yoga, 13557 Ventura Bl. Sherman Oaks, CA risinglotusyoga.com

"Twilight" Hype Unraveled

Stephenie Meyer's four-book series, The Twilight Saga, has become a worldwide phenomenon on the big screen with the release of "Twilight"(November, 2008) and "New Moon" (November, 2009).

So what's the hype all about? Twihards, the name coined for die hard Twilight fans, don't stop at just the expected teenage girl. In fact, twihards around the globe, men and women, of course mostly women, in their 30s, 40s and even 50s are raving about vampires and werewolves.

First, the obvious is the strikingly good-looking cast of monsters. If you don't like the story, eye candy like Edward Cullen (Robert Pattinson) or Jacob Black (Taylor Lautner) and Alice Cullen (Ashley Greene) or Rosalie Hale (Nikki Reed) will make the two hours more bearable. I admit Edward is easy on the eyes, but I'm not one of those obsessed Rob Pattinson fans. I keep my obsession controlled and limited to "Twilight" Edward, a character Meyer describes as "dazzling" and "perfect." Edward is charming and handsome, a modern-day Romeo or as modern as you can get for a century's old vampire posing as a 17-year-old.

Of course looks are only skin deep, so let's talk about the plot. The Twilight Series illustrates the love story of a vampire and a plain Jane high school human named Bella. In every relationship, there are ups and downs--trials and triumphs. The saga captures the essence of a first love, first heartbreak and a love triangle between two monsters fueled by enemy clans--vampires versus werewolves.

Underneath all the love spells and lovey dovey, sentimental moments, there's an entire history of war between vampires and werewolves. This isn't like your everyday love story. There are vampires with super powers and ferocious werewolves deeply rooted in their Native American culture and Bella, who is still a mystery to why vampire powers don't work on her.

I just watched the first "Twilight" movie a few months ago out of curiosity, and to be honest, I wasn't that impressed, but I was intrigued. I like the whole story of vampires and werewolves, and I'm a sucker for romance. I watched it again and again, and a new fan was born. I just finished reading the first book, which I enjoyed more than the movie. Since then, I naturally watched, "New Moon," which was entertaining especially with the multiple intentional cheesy chest shots of Jacob. Despite its oftentimes corny moments, Twilight is a beautiful love story, and the fact that vampires and werewolves are involved, makes the plot a lot more interesting and exciting.

I've never enjoyed watching a movie so many times, but "Twilight" is a light-hearted, feel good drama that I could watch repeatedly. Who doesn't want to be with someone who is loyal, romantic, protective and loves you unconditionally--not to mention he's amazingly gorgeous? As if Edward isn't enough, Bella also captures the heart of her hopelessly devoted werewolf best friend, Jacob.

I just started reading "New Moon," and I can't wait to find out what's in store for Bella and her monster lovers Edward and Jacob. "Eclipse," part three of the series, is set to release on June 30. Stay tuned twihards, and it's not too late to get on board. ;)

Breakfast at Tiffany's

Do people belong to each other? You meet someone who sparks your fancy, and you fall madly in love. The feelings are mutual. You're each other's "lobsters". Does that mean you "belong" to each other? Does anyone really belong to someone else? In "Breakfast at Tiffany's," Paul (Fred) tells Holly that she belongs to him.

It sounds a little possessive, but for romance sake, it's nice to have the security of having someone who will proudly and publicly label you as "boyfriend" or "girlfriend" and "husband" or "wife."

"Breakfast at Tiffany's" is one of my favorite classics to watch. Audrey Hepburn's character, Holly Golightly, is a capricious party girl who claims to be a free-spirited "wild thing" incapable of being in love. She encounters relationships with "rats", "super rats" and a Brazilian "coward little mouse." She blindly chases men who seem to be good on paper, but in the end the penniless writer Paul Varjak steals her heart.

It's an entertaining tale that leaves me thinking about life and love and the types of potential relationships I've encountered. I've had my share of rats and super rats--the guys who come and go, sometimes too suddenly. Regardless, everyone was an experience that came with lessons to be learned.

If people do belong to someone, we should be two complete individuals who choose to share our lives with someone else. None of that "You complete me," talk because people need to function solo in spite of being with someone.

"Two drifters off to see the world. There's such a lot of world to see. We're after the same rainbow's end-- waiting 'round the bend, my huckleberry friend, Moon River and me."

L-O-V-E.

Love love looooooooooooooooooove. All you need is love. This is not an entry about the loveliness of love. Rather the reality we come face to face with at some point or multiple points in our lives-- heart breakers are out there...beware! Getting your heart broken is just part of life, but how many times do we have to endure it before we meet someone who will stay? Is it all a game? Don't come off too strong. Don't make yourself too available because it'll make you seem desperate, needy and clingy. Don't tell each other how you really feel when you feel it especially if it's too early on in your "relationship." Don't be too communicative about your feelings. Don't mention labels. Why are there so many unspoken "rules" that seem to dictate a functional "relationship"? It shouldn't be that hard. Guys are weird, but I'm sure guys think gals are equally confusing.


There are a lot of "good guys" out there, and I've met some of them and dated them. But a good guy doesn't equate him to be a good boyfriend. Being a good boyfriend or girlfriend takes practice, and it doesn't happen over night. But if you want to be good for someone, you will be. So I can't stand those cop-out expressions, "I'm not good for you," or "You deserve better." Why not be good or better for me then? The real reason is he's just not that into me, and he's too much of a coward to say what he really feels. It's even worse, if he's felt this way for who knows how long and drags on a half-hearted relationship with you until finally, he realizes you're in love with him and he has to get out immediately. Why is it so scary to be committed to someone? I guess the answer consistently boils down to whether or not he's really into you. Because no matter how much time you want to spend with him or how long you want to talk to him or tell him how much you love him, he won't run away if he's really into you. He'll probably still be scared, but he'll be grounded enough to know what he has and smart enough to hang on to you as long as he can.


Bad guys break your heart, but the good guys can catch you by surprise and completely rip your heart into pieces. Heart breakers come in nice guy, good guy, shy guy, romantic guy, any guy. Finding that guy who will stay and want to make you happy is one of the greatest journeys in life. Without heartbreaks, we wouldn't know how sweet love can feel like. Afterall, the sweet is never as sweet without the sour.